Bejamin shall ravin as a wolf

It appears that Austin has already related the chat experience of the week...But I'm going to tell my end!

Just for some background, although the visitors' center sisters are the ones that get to be on the mormon.org chat, we are only scheduled for about an hour a week. The day we went in, we actually got there later than we were scheduled but were able to get on anyways. Most of the computers in the room weren't getting internet EXCEPT the one I was on. If mine hadn't been working, we would have just gone and done other things. After we left the one I was on stopped working. On chat, we get on the server and wait for anyone to send a message. People are sorted out according to availability- there are other people waiting to help in other visitors' centers as well. I cannot stress to you how slim the chances were that James (Austin's investigator) talked to me. Not only that he got onto chat during the only hour during the week that I was there, but that I wasn't talking to someone else at the time and that his message didn't get sorted out to one of the other 30 people online at the time. The odds are absolutely ridiculous. I kind of explained that to him before we left, but not completely.
Anyways.
As soon as James got on and it said that he was from Oxford, I knew he had seen Austin. I froze. He explained that two missionaries had stopped by and he still had some questions. He asked about our belief in evolution and creation, and was overall very respectful and curious. As his questions were pretty much coming to a close, I felt like I should ask who the two missionaries were that came to see him. He said Elder Dressman and Elder Paraso! I was SO happy. I decided to explain my connection to Austin dear and he didn't believe me haha. He thought I was pulling something on him, but I can definitely see why. He kept asking what the chances of that were. I asked if he would see them again and he said he hadn't planned on it but now felt like he had to- that God was trying to tell him something. I encouraged him to meet with them again and he said he was texting him right away. We had to go at that point because we were already over our scheduled hour.
Welp. Cool. Ha! Even on different continents we work well together, Austin and I. Good on ya.

I realized during the week that pretty much everything I said in my rant last week can be encapsulated in James 1:22 and 1:26-
22 But be ye doers of the word, and not hearers only, deceiving your own selves.
26 If any man among you seem to be religious, and bridleth not his tongue, but deceiveth his own heart, this man’s religion is vain.
I was going to ask why it is the scriptures are always able to say things so much better than I ever can and then I realized that's a really stupid question.
But really! Do you all realize that Satan has a perfect knowledge and faith in Christ's divinity? He knows better than we do who God is! So what? As James also goes on to say in chapter 2, "faith without works is dead." So what is the difference between us and Satan? Not faith! But what we DO we faith- how we act on Christ's name. Think about THAT next time you want to do something stupid.

So yesterday was my first day giving tours at the Smith Family Farm! (Sacred Grove, log home, frame home, visitors' center) I think that's my favorite site to be at our of the four. I just love that one. It was pretty busy so I gave tours on my own. I'm so glad that I get to serve up here in this area!

Something I've been thinking about for a while now is being strong. I've talked a tad about this idea before, namely considering the character of Christ, but it kind of keeps coming back. Come what may, I don't want to be someone that people need to worry about. I know that my parents, Donna and Dan, my extended family, and my friends will always be concerned with how I'm doing because they love me, but I don't ever want people to have to WORRY about me. Does that make sense? Late at night when you're trying to get to sleep I hope no one is tossing and turning because I'm struggling. Austin shouldn't have to spend time with his fingers crossed that I'm going to make it through whatever it is that is happening or that I'm going to get along ok. It needs to be known and understood that I'm always going to be okay! When you hear that something happens I want you to be able to say, "She's a strong girl. She'll pull through just fine. I'm not worried." rather than, "She's fragile...I hope she can handle this." And the thing is for the most part it's up to me! And it's up to each of us individually! We can become the kind of people who don't waver in storms. The kind of people who can be counted on when someone needs something or when something really needs to be done. You have to be the strong one now.

Last thing for the week, I was reading in 2 Corinthians 4 and I found a few verses that really get right to the heart of what I'm doing up here in snowy New York.
8 We are troubled on every side, yet not distressed; we are perplexed, but not in despair;
9 Persecuted, but not forsaken; cast down, but not destroyed.
13 We having the same spirit of faith, according as it is written, I believed, and therefore have I spoken; we also believe, and therefore speak.

Well, friends I don't have that much more to say. It's really more of a thinking/processing time at the moment. Everything I've written above finished processing during the week. Maybe next week the stuff that's processing right now will be finished. What am I some kind of oven? Ridiculous.
Love, love.
Bye now
Hermana Ray

PS HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ALY! I've had a package sitting on my desk for a week. The first time I went to send it, I got an AMAZING package from HER right before and then wanted to write something else so I waited, wrote a letter, put it in the package, went back, and then realized I didn't put the address on! Tried next day. They were closed! And then the next day. Lunch break! And then the next day was Sunday. I am...horrible at this. But there is something in the mail now and should get there sometime this week. Love you Al!
PPS I'm sending a picture of Sister Fetuli and me! One is from this weekend at the Sacred Grove and the other is from my first transfer with Sister Hess on the right. Sister Fetuli is a lot happier than she looks in pictures ha
PPPS Yesterday the Senior couple shooed us to the basement to hide for a good half hour because there's a man that comes every week to try and talk to the sisters who...they don't think is quite harmless. Scary! But kind of cool! Danja, danja danja.
PPPPS (This is getting out of hand) This week we were helping someone move apartments and they pulled out a candle with seashells in it and I was THROWN into seriously missing the beach. What is that?! Really it was painful. I need to be promised multiple beach trips after this is all said in done to be healed. Ow. Ow. Need. Beach. One day!

No te preocupes

Oh, hi!
This will probably not be as organized as last week. It seems my head has been going a bazillion miles a minute! Before my mission I was always thinking about something and adding to theories and whatnot, but now the material that I have to think about everything has multiplied 10 times over. For example, we spend most of our days in trailer parks because I'm on the poorer side of Shortsville. However, yesterday we walked in a more upper-middle class area. I realized something: no matter who it is, what religion they profess to practice, how much money they make or how old they are, we unfortunately share something in common. God is being put second, third, fourth, last and anywhere but first! There is no religion or faith that exempts people from getting their priorities straight...sorry! Let's think about this for a second. First, I admit that I am often harder on people who are faithful because there's much less of an excuse. But really- if you know that God lives and that we are expected to pray, do you have an excuse for not praying? If you know that the Bible and the Book of Mormon are the word of God, is there any lifestyle or schedule that exempts you from reading? So often when we're talking to people they say things like, "well I believe, but I'm really too busy to read every day." By now it really kind of makes me laugh. I've said things like that, too. "I'm too tired." "It's not a big deal." "I'll read tomorrow." "I have too many other things to do." Basically what all of those things mean is: "This isn't important enough for me. I believe in a supreme creator, but what I want to do is more urgent, so I don't really care to give Him the time of day."
Ouch. Back up. Rethink?
It's just interesting to me. That's all.

Man sometimes I wish my brain would slow down for a second.
So more mission info, yeah? I love Sister Fetuli! I'm so glad she's my trainer. She's also the type that I love her more every day- once I got past a lot of the cultural differences and stuff. I'm so glad that I get the chance to learn more about Tonga and about getting over my narrow perception of life. We pretty much spend all of our time in the car going back and forth between two songs on this one cd. We are happy that way, thank you. At least for now haha but we both have a bunch of other cds so I think we'll be alright.
There are only about 90 missionaries in my mission, which is pretty dadgum tiny. Out of those 90, a whopping 30 of them are sisters! That's crazy! And it's because we have the visitors center :) I think I know almost all of the sisters who are serving here right now and they are seriously all some of the greatest people I've ever met. I am so blessed to be serving in an area with such amazing people. How lucky can I get?! Every week we also get district meeting with a smaller group and we go to lunch afterwords. It's nice to have times like that where we regroup and kind of heal from battery haha. Moderation is key. 

Ok do you all realize that in less than a week Austin will have been out for 6 months? And I've already almost been out for 3? That's crazy! The adjustments slow things down but once I get used to the swing of things the weeks start picking up speed. This week I thought a lot about how I've changed already. I'm definitely still weird and me and whatnot, but the parts of me that were selfish at times or weak are slowly being rooted out. Thank goodness for that! I know Austin and I would have been ok if we hadn't served missions, but having this time to realize that my focus should be upwards has really helped me to be better for him, for my family, and all of my friends in the future. It's really just not about me, you know? I kind of thought it was for a little while there.

I forgot to mention this last time! We ARE a blogging and internet mission. So I have a new mission blog and facebook, but its kind of like being reincarnated as a missionary. We get a bit of time every week, but its mainly just to post things that people who live around here can read and such. I'm still not sold on the idea because for the most part when I get on facebook I automatically feel like I'm wasting time that that irks me, but at least it's not very often.

Ok one last little theory thing! I've been thinking about what traits make people successful. I'm not even referring to money, but traits that lead to stability and such. I know there's that book- "7 Habits of Highly Successful People" or something, but this is kind of a different spin. I was thinking about how there are really two levels. The first level is made up of things that anyone can do- it's not a character trait, it's something that anyone can implement into their lives. I came up with 6. Successful people are organized, clean, moderate, healthy, considerate and they are planners. Now, for things that tend to be character traits that help people to naturally become more successful. When these traits are added to the first 6 things I listed, rarely do you find someone who has NOT been successful. In my limited experience, anyways. Ok so the 6 traits I came up with are: courteous, intelligent, driven, visionary, observant, and optimistic.
I think sometimes we get frustrated because we don't separate those two trains of thought. We think, "well I'm just not supposed to be successful. It's easier for them." Well, maybe they have some traits that lend them towards success. However! I'm convinced that the first set- the things that we can become on our own, without the help of a predisposition- can lead anyone there. Sure, it would take a ton of diligence, but it's definitely doable! I don't know. Maybe I'm just blowing smoke here. Any thoughts? Thanks for putting up with my rambling, ya'll :)

Ah one more thing! Amanda Fowlkes' family (Jared and Eric) are up here in the Canandaigua ward! And they're GREAT! Jared teaches gospel principles and he's great! He's the only one I've really gotten to talk to so far, though. I was stunned when he said they already had the low down on me and here I had never seen him before haha. Busted! Anyways that was a nice surprise. I love connections! Also, everyone here is stunned that I don't have an accent hahaha shows what they know about the South.

Ok well that's it for this week. Have a great one!
Love,
Hermana Ray

Ofa late

Hello all! Florida is great!!

Just kidding. I'm in the arctic. :) But really HELLO FROM NEW YORK!!! First things first, New York is COLD. Although! It appears that I am already kind of acclimating because this morning we went running in about 4 inches of snow and I only wore a hoodie and I was ok! Actually if I had worn gloves I would have been ok. Still, quite the improvement. For those of you who have known me through winter (cough Austin are you reading this) your jaws are likely on your keyboard. Well GOOD. Hmph. Look at me triumphing snow and all that. Yeah.

Also, everyone says that this is the mildest winter in the past decade. Man does God love me.

Next! My trainer! Sister Fetuli is from Tonga and is learning English. She is happy all the time! But not the annoying bouncy I-want-to-kill-you happy. Just like content. Nothing really ruffles her feathers. It's nice. My favorite thing so far is that she says "da funny fing is" all the time. It doesn't even fit the context. But it's so good! "Da funny fing is we need to go to da store." Hahahaha sorry. Love it. So you're probably all wondering how that works out with my Spanish. Since this area is not highly Spanish, I just teach hispanic investigators on my own. There are only 4 Spanish speaking sisters in the mission. President says that eventually I'll definitely be in one of those areas, but for now he feels that I should be here.

Here! Ha I didn't even tell you my first area! I'm in Shortsville. What a silly name. We spend most of our time in a town called Canandaigua. What a BOSS name. Also I live in Farmington. Less boss.

President Christianson is AMAZING. Him and his wife are absolutely wonderful. They care so much about us and they are also both really smart which I love. Our first day here we got to go to some of the sites, including the Sacred Grove, of which I think he sent a picture home. It was great.

Ok more things about New York:
-The houses here are all old and beautiful! Besides the trailer parks. There is very little development here but people always seem to be moving. Where do they move you might ask? Like...5 minutes down the road. All the time. Hopping from house to house all within the same everything. It's so strange to me! But whatever works I suppose. I'll be sending pictures of the beautiful houses before too long.
-EVERYONE smokes here. When I first heard that before I started meeting people I thought, "Very funny. I'm from North Carolina. I'll be fine." Wrong! Everyone smokes here! If I come home with lung cancer...just kidding I'll be fine.
-I can't find cracked wheat anywhere! What the what?! Here I was all excited to start my new breakfast life and no dice. Instead I have been eating oatmeal which is a sad sad substitute. No matter. Thanks for NOTHING New York.
-Never use the highway! There are tollbooths everywhere that actually charge you. In Utah there are signs saying you will get charged but no tollbooths. Not here! No no. So you always use by roads to get everywhere. Also I am starting out driving here since Sister Fetuli is aversed to driving in NY. I can't say I blame her because she's from a small island in the pacific. This white stuff doesn't agree with her background. I slid once this week but my brilliant Drivers Ed information came back to my mind and we were safe :)
-My acne se fue! Tis gone! The east coast is BRILLIANT! Kinda cool, yeah? I'm ok with that. One less thing to worry about!
-One of my investigators is from Puerto Rico (one that I teach by myself since she's Spanish) thought that I was a native Spanish speaker! She just thought I had been born in Spain since I'm pasty white and I have a "funny accent." Ha! Folks do you know what this means?! I can consider myself fluent!! Yeeeaaahhh! I slipped up one night cause I was rill tired and that's when she asked what my first language was. Before then she couldn't tell! Yes yes yes!
-The Dressmans sent me Skyline chili a while back and this week I ate it...it might just be that I miss the Dressman an INSANE amount...but it was really good! What is happening to me?!!
-Right now we only work at the Visitors Centers on weekends because it is too blasted cold and not many people come out. Therefore, we are full proslyeting right now and will switch to half and half about April or May.
-I'm going to keep my address the same my whole mission- the Perinton Halls address- because when I move they'll still be able to get it to me. That's the address of the mission home and we have meetings every week so they are great about getting everything to me. When I first got to NY I had about 6 letters and a package waiting for me. Oh happy day! I could have cried from pure joy. CRIED I tell you.

Ok if I missed anything then let me know...I'm open to questions :) I'm sure I'll have a lot more to talk about next week. Oh and I'll always be emailing on Mondays now. I've had a lot to think about of course, but it's still processing and I'm not sure how to get it down just yet. Next week I will!
Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! Que tengan una buena semana,

Hermana Ray

PS Da funny fing is that my companion actually says "Sisteh Ray" because that's just how it comes out due to her accent. First Elder Poirier, now my trainer. Perrrfect.

Natalie and President & Sister Christianson

Hasta ver

SO. MUCH. NEWS.

First things first! My district left me at the beginning of the week :( I did cry slightly, but only like tiny leprachaun tears. I miss them. They were top shelf. Two stayed behind however, including my old companion and Hermana Greer. Hermana Pyle has been complaining about pain in her knee so they're keeping her back. She had an MRI a few days ago and there's nothing wrong...but she says she can't climb stairs so she's staying at the MTC for physical therapy. Hermana Greer had one or two slight emotional breakdowns about a week ago so they decided to reassign her to Denver, Colorado (still Spanish speaking) to be trained and then she'll head to Paraguay. This week she's been a lot better and she now leaves the same time I do...which is...THIS MONDAY AT WAY TOO EARLY!

So starting Wednesday I have been doing Visitors' Center training! Can I just say it has been so good. Amazing, in fact! I wish I could hug all of you who are glued to the screen because it is that good. Saturday night we'll be up at Temple Square helping to give tours! Wait that's tomorrow night. Whaaaat! Stoked. But that's not even the coolest part. I'll get to that. First I want to talk about my bomb.com district. There are 8 of us total- Sisters Madsen, McNamara, Earl and I are all going to Hill Cummorah and the other three are all from Utah. Sister Poon is from Hong Kong and she is going to the Visitors Center in Oakland, California. Sister Aruwiti (said like Ah-ru-wee-sis) is from Kidipest (um spelling what has happened to you) and she is going to the Visitors Center in St. George. Sister Poulson is one of the first Sisters to serve in the Portland, Oregon Visitors Center since it opens at the end of the month, and Sister T (No way am I spelling her name) is Tongan heading to the New Zealand Visitors Center! (DAD ITS YOUR PEOPLE) They are all SO wonderful. We don't really have companions right now ha so I just switch around who I teach with. Last night I taught with Sister Poon and it was really really great. One of the best experiences I've had teaching here I think. Her English is great and although we have different styles of teaching we were able to listen to each other well and it turned out great!

Ok so I'll get to what I think is the coolest part. Go to Mormon.org. Vayan! Do you see the chat button? Chat with live missionaries? Um...that's us! The Visitors center sisters! I have now been trained and yesterday I got to start. We always chat with our companions online as well, but its just an opportunity for anyone to get on and ask questions. Obviously we get a lot of dumb people with nothing better to do than waste their time and everyone elses, but even just yesterday I got to talk with people who had legitimate questions and wanted to understand better. It's great because sometimes people are embarrassed to ask a question or they don't have much time to meet with someone. Through chat we can set up return appointments (online) as well as help them meet with the missionaries who live next to them. Yesterday I talked to someone from the Netherlands and someone in California. Because of the way they have the rotation set up and because of New Zealand, there is someone on chat 24/7. I can't believe I'm lucky enough to be one of the people who does it! So if you have a friend who has a question, or if you have questions (anyone can get on and ask) then you know what to do! I'm a little nervous about some of the sisters that get on, but overall it's been really great so far. Also as a bonus, I'm allowed to chat Spanish speakers as well as English :) Woot!

Ok so I leave this Monday at 4am! Next week's email should be dazzling I would suppose. So much is happening! POR FIN! I realized that I'm really going to miss other people I've come to be close with here- two districts especially. After my district left and before I started VC training I was taken in from my homeless state from a district that came in a week after mine. There's also a random district down the hall that I've become super close to. Probably because of volleyball. Did you know that volleyball brings people together? Sometimes it makes them enemies but I'm not competitive enough for that.

One last thing! Please don't send any more dearelders. They don't print them on Saturdays or Sundays and then by Monday I'm gone so they will just trash any I get- it's not worth the money to forward them since it's a free service. Cartas, cartas! Envienme cartas, por favor! Thanks to everyone for how much support you've given me over the past 10 weeks. The MTC alone has been such a great experiences.
Miss and love many of you (Sorry but I don't know who reads my blog so the "everyone" word ain't comin)
Cheerios and cheetos!
Hermana Ray

PS. If anyone actually likes my swimming thoughts sorry I haven't had time to write them today. Next week! If you don't like them, Merry Friday!

Pavo pavo

Two big things on my mind this week:
1. Healer's art
2. Reward

First. Healer's art. The hymn "Lord I would follow Thee" is so good. Part of the 3rd verse says (I think), "I would be my brother's keeper, I would learn the healer's art." Suddenly I started thinking of all the people I will meet in my life. It was even a little strange- I almost felt like I could see a few of them- people I've never met. I've realized recently how much power each of us have, especially in the lives of people who are close to us. Every single day we have probably hundreds of opportunities to either make someone's day a little brighter or make them feel that much worse. It's not necessarily that our dispositions are determined by circumstance or how people treat us (that's no good) but I don't think anyone can deny how much  better your day is when an old friend catches up with you or maybe a sibling does or says something particularly nice. Getting letters, saying hi to people...all of the little things have that much influence to help someone feel important and loved. What if everyone was a little more conscious of the power they had? If you realized that you could help a family member feel happier today, would you do it? If you were aware that being rude or sharp to them would make them feel small and hurt, would you still do it? So many times I have done something thinking only of myself when it wouldn't have taken much at all to ask my companion how she was or to listen to someone when you know they are upset about something. It seriously takes so little. Why can't I be good more often? New resolve.

Second. In the scriptures, in church, just talking about God in general...we mention blessings all the time. We talk about how if you pay tithing He pours out so many blessings that we won't have room to receive them. The word of wisdom gives us healthy bodies and clearer minds. Not killing people and not committing adultery are obvious in their blessings. 

However!

Just think for a second- do you go to church on Sunday or read the scriptures or pray or keep yourself from stealing or any of the other things God has asked of us because you have been promised blessings? Or do you follow Him because He asked you to and you love Him? In teaching people on the mission sometimes it's hard to explain why we don't drink coffee or alcohol or we pay 10% of our income. I've come to think of it this way: If God asked you to stop eating apples, would you eat them anyways? Would you think about it and say, "Well there's nothing wrong with apples. Doctors say they are good for me. It's ok if I have an apple sometimes"? Obviously not. I know sometimes it's hard to just go on faith that the things we're commanded to do are from God. You know what the best part about that is? You can ask Him! In fact, you're supposed to! Never in a lesson do we ask whoever we're teaching to just believe us. I'm 21. What do I know? We always ask them to think about it, and pray to know for themselves.
So back to the point- if we only do what we know we should be doing because we will get rewards from God, (and we always do! He has blessed me more than I deserve) what would happen if He stopped giving us things? Would we have the right to stop obeying His laws? To stop being good people? I hope you don't have to think about that for too long. The Savior has atoned for me and provided a way to return to live with my Heavenly Father. If I never received another blasted thing for as long as I live- if I lost everything and everyone that I love- I would STILL be in debt over my head. I follow what I have been asked to do because I love my Savior. It's really as simple as that.


Ok! Now that you've been to church for the 2nd time this week, onto the random stuff. My district leaves on Monday! I will be a lone wolf for a tad and then I'll be with a new, all visitor's center sisters, district. With a new companion! Ah! For anyone who wants to send something but isn't sure if it will get  to the MTC by February 6th (better safe than sorry on this one) my NY address until further notice will be:
Hermana Natalie Raines
New York Rochester Mission
100 Perinton Hills Office Park Ste 120
Fairport, NY
14450-3608

(Kenna would you mind updating facebook and my blog? Thank youu)

My district and I have been in this place for so long that we've started inventing Spanish words. Fefarse is a verb meaning "to endure to the end." Ex: Estoy fefandome or Ella se fefa
We are good. I know.

Also, "pavo" means silly in Spanish. "Pavo" also means turkey. So...naturally we've started calling people "pavo pavo." What would YOU do if you found that out? Obviously the same. No question.

Ok I'm out for the week. Someone tell Amanda Jones to put the pen to the paper. LOVE YOU ALL BYE
Hermana Ray

La cosa no quiere ayudarnos

Good week! Twas a good week. Where to start?

First of all, I have a new scripture to add to my list of favorites. It is 2 Timothy 1:7 and it says "For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind."
SO. GOOD.

Also, Acts 5:38-39 says "And now I say until you, refrain from these men, and let them alone: for if this counsel or this work be of men, it will come to nought: but if it be of God, ye cannot overthrow it; lest haply ye be found even to fight against God." 
Whenever someone here finds out that I'm going to the Hill Cumorah Visitor's Center, they feel the need to tell me two things. 1) It will be cold. (YES AWARE OF THIS THANKYOUBYE) 2) There are a lot of anti-Mormon protestors up there. Ah, yes. Less than excited about that. But between the two above scriptures, I'm really not worried. I know with all of my heart that I'm doing a good work. My intent is to uplift and help whoever I meet, regardless of background or belief. Throughout history there have been those who have been upset at people who witness of Christ. I'm not sure why...anyone who knows me knows I am anything but a threat. Ha. I think when I get home I'll stand in front of homeless shelters and health clinics to protest. Woo!
(Ahem. Kidding. Just for posterity's sake.)
But really. You know what every missionary is required to memorize and state as our purpose? Our purpose is to "bring others unto Christ." This week at a workshop we had a lesson/discussion (mostly targeted at a few zealots from Utah) talking about the different times in our lives we've been buoyed up by those of other faiths- inspired by their enthusiasm and faith. In my life I have been supported and taught more than I deserve by those who believe different things than I do. I'm just spending the next year and a half of my life trying to pay those people back and add light to light. I've been so blessed. Why is it that everyone can't be as blessed as I have been? I have friends currently serving and teaching of Christ in Madagascar, England, Denmark, Sweden, Chile, Peru, Argentina, Mexico, the Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico, the Netherlands, and Russia, not to mention half of the states. I believe that God works through mankind. If you don't share that belief, I invite you to consider all of the beautiful people who surround you and have surrounded you in the past. Don't forget about them.

Yesterday our district had the opportunity to be host missionaries! Which means we get to essentially babysit a neuvo as they enter the MTC, get their books and residence and all that. It was great! I was assigned to Siera Christensen from some place in Cananada......I am really horrible and don't remember where. Ah! Anyways she is really great and I'm glad to have had the chance to know her. No fears, just ready to roll. Can't say the same thing for some of the new Elders I saw walking around...for some of them this is their first time leaving home for real, they don't really know why they're here or how they can get by without their mother's laundry and cooking, and most of all many people who enter the MTC haven't figured out if they have faith or not. Being a witness of Christ would be pretty terrifying if you weren't sure about Him. Hopefully they figure it out. However, there are many who go home every week before ever entering the field. This work calls for conviction. 

Mostly what I want to share from this week are quotes ha. I kept running into people or listening to people who had something to share! Have you ever thought about the fact that it is unlikely that you will ever meet anyone in this world who does not know something you could benefit and learn from? Experiences? Character traits? Dreams? Thoughts? EVERYONE has something to offer. Insane. Try not getting overwhelmed by THAT thought as you walk down a busy street downtown! So much to learn!
-"If you focus on yourself, you will only feel happy when you are satisfied. When you love everyone else, your joy will be constant." -Elder David A. Bednar
-"We're in big trouble, and there's only one way out."
-"Just do good and be good!"
-"Righteous desires cannot be superficial, temporary, or selfish."
-"A disciple of Christ lives in the frontier of faith."

And to end, a poem:
"'Come to the edge,' He said.
'No!' we said, 'we'll fall!'
'Come to the edge,' He said.
'No!' we said, 'we'll fall!'
'Come to the edge!' He said.
We came to the edge.
He pushed us.
We flew."


Is it not time God sent His armies to revive a dying world?

I hope everyone that finds this finds themselves doing well. Only a bit longer in the MTC, now!
-Hermana Ray

P90X

Wokay! Not much time! Ah!

This week has been busy and good. Really random things made it good, methinks. For instance every Tuesday we get up at 5:50 and go do service, and this week the 4 Hermanas in my room were assigned to do floors! So! We got someone to mop and then took turns strapping cloth to our shoes and skating around, making up weird songs. So. Good. Just so you all know, I am building a sick set of abs because I laugh too much. Ahh yes.

Starting this week I've decided to make it a goal to memorize 50 Spanish vocab words a week. This means, dear friends, that I will have around 3500 extra ones memorized by the time I get home. WHATS UP.

We got a new teacher because Hermana Murillo's 3 years of working at the MTC are up and they only let you have 3 :( I was devestated. Our new teacher served her mission in Panama and her name is Hermana Graham. She's really nice...but doesn't seem to think we're as funny as we think we are. Lame. She also has really good consonants in her accent but then her vowels are flat. It's strange...and highly entertaining to listen to for all the wrong reasons.

I have an announcement! I have written another song while at the MTC. I was sitting studying one morning and then it popped in my head so I went to a piano really fast, jotted it down, and here it is. I'm stoked to record it when I get home after a while. It'll be rill nice. Keenan suggested I name it "Let's start again, shall we?" and I rather like it.

And I may tell all my bones
To stand aside; Awake my soul!
Await the day and shed the pain
The past can be so cold
An unforgiving pace of time
It's about time I changed my mind
Lay to waste the days of grey
Before we grow too old

Be not far from me
Be not thou far from me

And every day we're waging war
Do you know what you're fighting for?

For truth, for hope, for strength to cope
To make it one more day
In this, you're not the only one
We fight until the night is done
Though scars and tears may paint the years
There is no other way

Be not far from me
Be not thou far from me

Perfect love casteth out all fear
I am not afraid


I got a letter from Emily DeKam yesterday saying that my album helped her through finals week and it absolutely made my life. SO HAPPY to hear things like that! I hope that at least while I'm gone the songs I've written will make their way to people who need them. One of these days I'll pick it back up and record some more. I love that feeling.

Ok so you're probably wondering what my theme-ish has been this week or at least what has been concocting in this brain o' mine. Basically, I've been thinking about how downright cool it is that everything in the gospel has ties to the natural world. Faith is like a seed, etc. This week I was wondering why it is so many people know of Christ and know they should have faith to "pick up their cross" and become more of who He would want them to be...and yet just don't do it. Why are so many people afraid of doing what's right? Well, it's the same reason we're afraid of exercise programs and diets. We know very well that they will make us healthier. We know with full hearts what it is we need to do- lose weight, eat healthier, build stronger muscles, etc. But it's not easy! It's actually really hard! Having faith and becoming a better person every day is hard too, you know? It takes effort and it takes swallowing a lot of pride. Fiona Apple has a line in one of her songs that says, "I could swallow the sea to wash down all this pride." Sounds about right to me.
Every year we make News Years Resolutions and every year there are people (I would venture to say the majority of us) who just let those resolutions drop. When are we going to take care of ourselves for real? Spend less money? Eat healthier? Run every day? Pray and read scriptures every day? If you are reading this and think you could honestly tell me that you don't feel the need to do any of those things I would be interested to hear it. We all do. So...what are we doing?

I hope this week is wonderful for everyone! I'll write again in a week (or sooner if you wrote me a letter cause I'll be writing responses today!)
Love,
Hermana Ray