The evidence

On top of it being the end of a new year, the end of the transfer is nigh! Calls will be in by next week. I am always curious as to what will happen considering every few months just about everything in my life changes, but I've seen so many times that what needs to happen happens, so I don't worry as much as I used to. Things work out.

 

The biggest news I have for this week is SNOW! Collectively we've received about 2 feet of snow here. It's insane! People here practically haven't noticed but I can't get over it! I've actually really enjoyed it so far to be honest. We've been shoveling a lot of driveways, and we took a break to make the most awesome igloo you've ever seen! Aptly named Fort Kie. Pictures....will come in the future :) Two 11 year-old girls from across the street pulled out their snow gear and decided to help us. I have found myself two more little sisters! They are great, and we will be going back this week to see them and their families. I've really enjoyed watching fleet of snow Wall-e's dispatch, especially when the downfall is consistant. I love how societies and individuals adapt to circumstances. We always say to ourselves- what would happen if...? But truly when we find ourselves in feared situations, we just keep on going somehow. I've decided that I would really like to live in a place that got snow as long as I had good snow gear to play in. And a good soup cookbook!

 

Both Sister Hausauer and I gave talks at church yesterday- mine was on Henry B. Eyring's talk from this past General Conference called "Where is the Pavilion?" Here is the link:
http://www.lds.org/general-conference/2012/10/where-is-the-pavilion?lang=eng

I focused my talk on being able to remove the barrier when we feel distant from God through becoming childlike and in serving others.
"For the natural man is an enemy to God, and has been from the fall of Adam, and will be, forever and ever, unless he yields to the enticings of the Holy Spirit, and putteth off the natural man and becometh a saint through the atonement of Christ the Lord, and becometh as a child, submissive, meek, humble, patient, full of love, willing to submit to all things which the Lord seeth fit to inflict upon him, even as a child doth submit to his father." Mosiah 3:19
I have found on my mission that I have only been able to gain even the smallest vision or insight into the work when I get over myself and realize that I am insufficient on my own! I'm grateful that I've been able to become more acquainted with the slightest pricks of pride- I know what it feels like when I'm holding onto something and think I know best. I'm grateful to have been broken down in that way.

 

We also taught Relief Society haha it was busy day. We were asked to teach about how to prepare children and youth for missions. We decided to teach the Restoration, since the best way to strengthen anything spiritual and prepare for the future is to gain your own testimony that the Church of Jesus Christ was restored through Joseph Smith and that living prophets continue to guide the church. It's a big question, and the only way to know is by searching on your own. It was fun to teach that and I think it went well! I am serving in a really great ward.

Well that's pretty much it for this week! I'll email you all next year :) I hope everyone is well. Happy New Year!
Sister Raines

Brave

How was everyone's Christmas?! The libraries were closed the last two days so we are able to email today!

It's been pretty busy around here for the season as I'm sure everyone can say. We've been doing a lot of service at a homeless shelter in Irondequoit- organizing and distributing donated Christmas presents to the homeless and needy. The House of Mercy has been a really interesting experience in general. We've been helping with them for weeks now. Before Christmas we helped organize storage units, clean, etc. It's been really wonderful to see because although the house itself is located on one of the more rough streets in town, there is a sense of respect. In fact, at the close of one of the days of gift distributing, we were surprised to find out that the man guarding the door only letting so many people in the gift room at a time was T-bone- one of the biggest drug lords in the city of Rochester. Ha! We think so often in terms of black and white: If you do this, you are this. If you do that, you are that. I've learned so much about loving people separate of their choices. It doesn't make all choices right, and it certainly doesn't mean all choices lead to happiness, but we're all playing a different game. In the end, I think people really pull through.

This year I have been extremely moved by Christmas music! The Rochester and Buffalo zones got together for part of Tuesday and there were some musical numbers performed there, as well as the Christmas program on Sunday. My two favorite Christmas songs are O Come Emmanuel and O Holy Night I think. They are just so good. I'm grateful for the power that music has to hit something home that just speaking can't do.
So I might as well send the lyrics to the Christmas song I wrote! One of the elders learned a harmony part, and Sister Brown learned the piano and then amplified it so it actually came out sounding pretty good!

In a stable long ago
From the Heavens came a King
Sent to bring us safely home
Let all Earth and nature sing
Hallelujah! Glory, laud, and honor be His sacred name
Hallelujah is the message! Let the whole wide world proclaim

Be with them that seek Him
Never let the candle dim
I wish the whole world knew
Let Him be the reason
For this Christmas season
Let there be peace in you

Let your hearts be filled with light
When tribulation sounds the drum
Be not fearful of the future
Christ the King has overcome
Hallelujah! Glory, laud, and honor be His sacred name
Hallelujah is the message! Let the whole wide world proclaim

Be with them that seek Him
Never let the candle dim
I wish the whole world knew
Let Him be the reason
For this Christmas season
Let there be peace in you. 

A group of missionaries went caroling this week to different people in the area! We did not sing the song I wrote haha :) I haven't been caroling for as long as I can remember. Normally I'm actually pretty opposed to it because it's fairly awkward to make people stand in the cold as they listen to mediocre melodies from half strangers, but because this time we were able to pick people who we knew would appreciate it, it was good! 

It was so good to talk to everyone yesterday! My heart is full. I'm so grateful for all the support I've received so far on my mission. The last few months will be the best I am sure of it.

Till next week!
Sister Raines

Filters and feeble minds

This week I learned a lot about how important it is to see things as they really are.

"Behold, my brethren, he that prophesieth, let him prophesy to the understanding of men; for the Spirit speaketh the truth and lieth not. Wherefore, it speaketh of things as they really are, and of things as they really will be; wherefore, these things are manifested unto us plainly, for the salvation of our souls." (Jacob 4:13)

 

The Spirit testifies of truth- things as they REALLY ARE and really will be. That is so important! Off and on I've had a theme of mental instibility and the idea of a sound mind. I had a chance to talk with President Christianson this week about some of the struggles that have presented themselves over the last 2 months. As I talked with him, I realized how altered my perception of reality had become. In Buffalo I learned to be confident in myself and my ability to perform the tasks I was asked to do with God's help. I felt valued, needed, and healthy. I grew even more in Brockport, and although I was aware of weaknesses, my understanding and gratitude for Christ's sacrifice and power was growing as well. I knew I was far from perfect, but I knew I had infinite worth in the eyes of God.There is some serious power in that understanding- knowledge of who we are to God moves us to want to be better and gives us the sense of stability and value which we so desperately need. It comes as no surprise then that those without this understanding search frantically for anything else that might give them a sense of place. It might take the form of merit in academics, career, financial assets, trite compliments, or even self medication to dull the pain of the void.
These past few months I realized how easy it is to get off base. Embarrassing as it is, I lost sight of who I am for a little while. I was hurt, and I retreated from what I knew. I turned away from those around me. How quickly ideas grow! I imagined myself to be of little worth, and stopped trusting and confiding in so many, beginning with my companion and mission president. I've struggled to keep in contact with just about anyone from home- even my letters to Austin have struggled. Even more devastating though, my prayers have struggled. How often do we find solace in the company of strangers when we question our self worth? How often do we think we'll be happier with people who don't know how small we really are instead of trusting those who can hurt us? God included?
I am working on making a better effort to come to people instead of run, starting with my Father in Heaven. For today, I am trusting that I matter to Him.

"Yea, verily I say unto you, if ye will come unto me ye shall have eternal life. Behold, mine arm of mercy is extended towards you, and whosoever will come, him will I receive; and blessed are those who come unto me." (3 Nephi 9:14)

Today there is a huge Christmas activity at the Visitors Center, so all the Sisters are in Palmyra for the day. Should be fun :) The two that are in Brockport are staying at our apartment for a few days and it's been really great so far! I'm am blessed to know such great people. I wrote a Christmas song over the last couple weeks, too, and I'll be performing that so I hope it goes well!

Till next week! Love,
Sister Raines

Never take wooden nickels

Hi!

So....this week was very up and down! In the end though, a lot has been ironed out and I'm a better person than I was a week ago. That's what I asked for by coming out here, wasn't it?

A huge highlight about the week was I got to go on an exchange with Sister Madsen! We came out to New York together and we get along great. It was one of the best days of the last few months!

With Christmas coming close, we are spending a lot of time trying to share Christmas messages with people. I've been writing a Christmas song...I can't remember if I've mentioned that before. It's coming along pretty well! I've got a few other missionaries working on it with me. I will let you know how it goes. I apologize in advance because I really am left without money or time to go Christmas shopping this year. I've been working on some killer cards, but it appears that it might be all I've got to give this year. I hope no one is hurt, I'm just slightly limited currently. I hope everyone's Christmas is good anyways! Haha :)

Things in Brighton with Sister Hausauer are good. I'm am getting better acclimated to the Visitors' center. Nothing truly interesting to tell in a story, but I am doing well.
I hope everyone is good!
With love,
Sister Raines

My exchange with Sister Madsen! Sure do love her.

And in the end, we begin again.

First item of business:

We have a Christmas tree.

No, like you don't understand. It's as legit as you can get as a missionary. Two of the elders dropped it off (it looks kind of like the tree from Charlie Brown?) in front of our apartment as a joke....but we definitely made the best of it. Fixed it up, filled it with makeshift ornaments, and placed my fuzzy pink birthday tiara at the top as a celebratory "Happy Birthday, Jesus" star. I am so proud. I'll take some pictures before Christmas. Just thought you all should know I will be spending this Christmas in style.
Recently, I am learning more and more about the balance between two principles demonstrated in the following verses. They're short, don't worry.
1. And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive. (Matt. 21:22)
2. Not that I speak in respect of want: for I have learned, in whatsoever state I am, therewith to be content. (Phil. 4:11)
Are you getting my dilemma? Understand that these concepts are only contradictory in extreme terms. Essentially, ask for what you need, but be content with what you've got. It's an eternal cycle of humility- always learning more how to rely on God for everything and go to Him for help. Always seeking progress and betterment, and finding joy and peace in the blessings you already have. I may never master the balance between these two concepts, but I am trying to get better at them. It seems so often I lean too much on one side or the other.


The beginning of this transfer has been pretty good. I like what Austin talked about today concerning opposition- it really is true. Opposition is necessary for growth, and it's abundant when we are moving in the right direction. Bad things happening when you're moving in the wrong direction are really more consequences than opposition. Similar looking, but very different in nature. Anyways we've been able to spend our time more effectively this week, but with it and the true commencement of winter (first snow, yadda yadda) I have felt myself kind of draining away ha. It is a strange phenomenon. I am happy when we are helping people. The first moments waking up and the slower moments in between (travel time, slow visitor center shifts, etc) it becomes increasingly harder to function. No worries- I will pull through just fine. Ultimately the greater the challenge the greater the glory, right? Completing my mission in just over 5 months will be a great accomplishment because I will have given everything I knew how. If I didn't know 100% that the things we are teaching are true I would have come home by now. Not just that I know it a little bit, or that I ignore the parts that I'm not sure about, but the whole message. Those young guys in ties and actually know what they are talking about! And that makes it worth everything. I would do all of this over again.


I hope everyone is happy and healthy at home. Don't let this Christmas pass by! No sense the "grin and bear it"attitude when there is so much to be thankful for.

Love,
Sister Raines

PS I don't mean to preach :) it's just what's been on my mind this week. Just so you all know!