Vexation & Envy

I am fed up with excuses for unhappiness.

I am tired of hearing that life is only wonderful during youth. That families and mortgages are perpetual black rain clouds. Enjoy life now because it's all downhill after graduation. I refuse to believe that circumstance or age are in control of contentment. I understand that relationships can be stressful, and that carrying for children is a task. However, it makes me sick to hear children and spouses being spoken of as nothing more than baggage and a burden. Claiming that happiness was only abundant during the young, single stretch of life is an allegation that life was better before those loved ones were a part of it. If that's the way things are, the personal choice to get married and start a family merits no pity. Life is about making choices and moving with them. If you made some wrong ones, work on making the best of them and stop blaming your displeasure on a stage in life.

And when it ends

Well, my journey back to Provo begins in the morning before the sun rises. My study abroad in Mexico is at an end.

You may be expecting me to return home thoroughly bronzed with an extensive Spanish vocabulary, complete with accent. Unfortunately, I am only slightly bronzed with a functional vocabulary and a glaringly obvious American accent. I hope no one is too disappointed.

Most of my overarching thoughts have been put up here periodically as they came to me, more or less. However, as anything ends, we're expected to look back and wrap things up. Illustrate a moral to the story, if you will. SO rather than repeat what I've said before, let's run through what this trip has given me, shall we?

A stamp in my passport.
The oh-so-impressive "Study Abroad to Mexico" on my credentials, therefore increasing my merit as a human being.
An 'A' in Spanish 205.
A few friends on facebook who only speak Spanish.
A distinct tan line.
Three jars of salsa and one bottle of cajeta.
Fifteen more close friends.
An appreciation for tap water.
Material for the Mexico video (in progress).
Close to 1,000 pictures.
A Mexican soccer jersey (remember the World Cup? Yeaahh).
Two CDs of Latin music.
A handful of Mexican sayings.
More appreciation for being with Austin again.
New regard for my pale skin.
Gratitude for being a native English speaker.
A greater understanding of humanity as a whole.
Intense cravings for Chinese food.
An addiction to nightly thunderstorms.
Thrashed feet and a battered pair of chacos.
An obsession with weddings.
A love for Spanish cathedrals.
New ideas for food back home.
One sick 90's playlist.
The experience of trying and falling in love with filled churros.
A legit ISP bag.
A bee sting.
Drive to continue learning Spanish.
A desire to live in the city.
A need to travel more in the future.

I'd say the trip was a success. Yeah?

What would you say to me?

I've always thought that spoken language meant so much. And it does, but really it doesn't. Despite any deficiency in articulate description, deep feelings exist. In the end, the most important moments are the ones that render us speechless.

Visionary

Who's the idiot who invented electricity and therefore created the option of waking up at 4 a.m.? My dear Crystal pointed out today that if we didn't have electricity we would just all go to sleep when the sun went down and wake up when the sun was up again. Why do we torture ourselves so?



*Note: I know who invented electricity. Don't you dare leave some smart comment about how beneficial electricity has been to mankind.

Officially Unofficial Diagnosis

I think I may have figured out what my problem is.

After spending two months in a home with an incredibly loving, caring family and four solid days with Austin, I have come here. Guadalajara, Jalisco, Mexico. I haven't had a legitimate hug in almost two months, and to be honest I'm going through withdrawals. I realize that not everyone's family gives hugs like mine. Not many people have little brothers that like to sneak in to share your twin bed. I am yet to see anyone with a mother who embraces people as if they were teddy bears. Many people aren't fortunate enough to spend so many consecutive hours attached at the hip to their love. Maybe the people in my little group from BYU aren't cold and unfeeling. Maybe they're just not used to being close to people. In any circumstance, I can't do it much longer. I may never let the poor fool go who first allows me to hug them when I get back to the states. I never signed up for this.

I am a fan of this.

I am also slightly obsessed with weddings as of the last two months.

I blame Cheyenne.

I have long been obsessed with flowers.

12

I've reached it.

I'm ready to go back home. Please.